Yeah, I know...

I know what most of you are thinking, "don't you already have like two blogs?" Yeah, I know.

But I locked myself out of them because I can't remember the password. And the email address I used for those is no longer valid. I haven't used it in forever so it has expired. Or if it hasn't, I don't remember the password for it, and I can't figure out a way to get back into it. Too much work, and its just much easier to start a new one.

So yes, here it is.
I don't have much to say, but I figured I would explain the title of my blog.

I'll preface it with this, I'm a huge Andrew Peterson fan. His music is awesome. If you haven't heard of him. I insist you go and look him up. Amazing storyteller. Seriously. And he's a native Illinoisan turned Florida transplant. Like me. So that's cool.

Anyway, he has this really awesome song called The Good Confession. It's a song that every time I hear it, it breaks me. It's simply his testimony put into song. And it's beautiful, but the bridge is probably my favorite part:

"All I know is that I was blind but now I see that though I kick and scream, Love is leading me.

 And every step of the way his grace is making me; with every breath I breathe, he is saving me."

Though I kick and scream- Love is leading me. 

My daughter is about 20 months old. There are days when she has fits because I won't let her do things she's not supposed to do. Things that are potentially dangerous at times, like climb the stairs and venture out without holding mommy's hand. So I pick her up and carry her, and she kicks and screams (sometimes bites, that's a relatively new thing). She doesn't quite get that I'm doing it for her protection, because I love her. And some days it baffles me. 

But then I turn around, and do the same things. 

God protects me from the things that will bring harm to me. And I fight it at times, and question, and kick and scream (quite often crying) and wonder why God would keep me from something that I think I want so badly. But He is leading me. In love. With protection. He knows better than I do. He knows what that I think I want is no good for me, so he keeps me from it, no matter how bad I think it may be at the time.

So this blog is my journey: as a mother, as a wife, as a woman of God. The hilarity and the heinous, the terrifying and the tender. As I kick and scream, whether in laughter or struggle, through this crazy ride, I hope you can relate maybe even a little, or be encouraged by what I can manage to type in the little time between Z's bedtime and mine. :)